Seems like it has been a long winter season in more ways than one. Trent and I are getting ready to travel to see a doctor in North Carolina. I have been praying for God's leading on this one for awhile now, and although we had a couple of different possibilities...God seemed to confirm this track. So this weekend we will be setting off for a new adventure.
I have been a little restless and a little nervous. It's always hard for me to start all over again with a new Dr.. I wonder if it will be worth the effort, will they listen, will they be kind, considerate, compassionate? Will they respect me and my family and all that we have been through?...Can I continue to face my fears? Will this be a waste of our time, money and effort? Will it even work? Is it going to cause me to go backwards or through more pain than I can handle? So many questions that seem to cycle around again and again.
But, God continues to remind me that He is with me. No matter the road I am on, or the journey that lay before me, my responsibility is to keep my eyes on Him. To learn to walk at His pace, not mine. He continues to give me enough strength for each day. Though so many times I try to "store up" enough strength and wisdom for the next month....God gently reminds me...Tammy, that's not how it works. I know you better than you will ever know yourself. Trust Me. I created you and I know that you need me everyday....I am the only one who is sufficient for your need. (nothing or no one else....not even yourself can do it.)
So here I am again today...".casting all of my care onto Him , because He cares for me!" and choosing to give my "load" to Him to carry....my thoughts, questions, concerns, burdens, and trusting that He will be the God that He said He would be...and that He has proven to be throughout this entire journey.